Sharing a bed is often seen as a cornerstone of intimacy and connection in a relationship. But for many couples, the reality is a nightly battle against snoring, blanket-hogging, tossing and turning, and conflicting sleep schedules. When one person's habits consistently disrupt the other's rest, it can lead to resentment and fatigue that spills over into the daytime.

But you don't have to choose between your relationship and a good night's sleep. This guide offers practical solutions to the most common sleep problems couples face, helping you and your partner find a way to sleep harmoniously together. Using our sleep calculator can also help you both find a baseline to work from.

Solving the Most Common Couple's Sleep Problems

Problem 1: The Snorer and the Sleeper

This is arguably the most common and disruptive issue. Loud snoring can make it impossible for the non-snoring partner to fall or stay asleep.

• Rule Out Sleep Apnea: First and foremost, chronic, loud snoring can be a sign of obstructive sleep apnea, a serious health condition. Encourage your partner to see a doctor.
• Try Positional Therapy: Snoring is often worse when sleeping on the back. Encourage your partner to sleep on their side. Special pillows or even sewing a tennis ball onto the back of a pajama shirt can help.
• Use Sound Masking: For the non-snoring partner, high-quality earplugs or a white noise machine can be very effective at masking the noise and making it less jarring.

Problem 2: The Night Owl and the Early Bird

When a Wolf chronotype and a Lion chronotype share a bed, their natural sleep schedules are in direct conflict. The key here is compromise and mutual respect.

• Stagger Your Bedtimes: Agree on a time when the early bird goes to sleep. The night owl can stay up later in another room or use a dim, focused book light that doesn't illuminate the whole room. Using headphones for TV or music is also a must.
• The Quiet Exit: The early bird should make their morning exit as quiet as possible. This means laying out clothes the night before and using a gentle, non-audible alarm, like a vibrating smartwatch or a sunrise alarm clock that gradually brightens.

"A successful sleep partnership is built on the same foundation as a successful relationship: communication and compromise."

Problem 3: The Blanket Hog and the Restless Sleeper

Constant movement or a battle over the covers can lead to fragmented sleep for both partners.

• The Scandinavian Method: This is a game-changer. Instead of one large comforter or duvet, use two smaller, separate ones—one for each person. This completely eliminates the war for the covers.
• Consider a Larger Bed: If space and budget allow, upgrading from a Queen to a King size bed can provide enough personal space to make one person's tossing and turning less disruptive to the other.
• Address Underlying Restlessness: If one partner is extremely restless, it could be a sign of an underlying issue like Restless Legs Syndrome (RLS), which warrants a doctor's visit.

When to Consider a "Sleep Divorce"

The term sounds dramatic, but for some couples, sleeping in separate beds or rooms is the best solution. If one partner's unresolved, severe snoring or movements are causing chronic sleep deprivation in the other, sleeping separately can actually save the relationship. It allows both people to get the restorative sleep they need, making them healthier, happier, and less resentful during their waking hours together.